Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
