My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Me too!
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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