so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Your penis caused this!
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
