could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
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