I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Randomize
