Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
