I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
