In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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