I bet he comes in French.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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