Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
