am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
you win again, gameday.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
