I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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