omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I would ride that face into the sunset
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize