We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
