wake up i wanna do it froggy style
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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