Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
He better not be in your backpack
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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