Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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