I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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