I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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