he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Randomize
