champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I need a beard to bite.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Randomize
