"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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