You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
