i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
