i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
