hell yes lets make some ravioli
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Randomize
