I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Randomize
