Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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