he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
