yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I don't think brook has ever known best
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
