My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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