Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize