After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize