the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Randomize
