where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
