just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
