big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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