she was so not down for the gang bang
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
did i just pee glitter
Randomize
