This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize