she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
