Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
