Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
