Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
vagina is talking i cant
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
