I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
This house was built for laser tag.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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