Need sex. Gaining weight.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
