i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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