put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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