So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
