btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Floor bacon is actually really good
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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