I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
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