It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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