Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i dont even know how to be here
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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